Focus is the central activity that runs my everyday experience. What I mean is that whatever I focus on, it becomes the lens in which I interpret my world.
How do I control my focus? The mind is a world processing center that can choose infinite possibilities. From sadness, to gladness, to how to make it through my day, routine, or relationships.
Focus is determined by the questions I ask of myself and the response I make from questions asked of me.
Questions focus the mind.
I focus my attention by being aware of what I’m asking. My attention or mind is not only less distracted, it is less over stimulated.
Questions allow me to see what I want to receive. They also pinpoint my mind into determining what I will choose to do moving forward.
Questions can expand possibilities or shrink me into a fear based consciousness.
I know all of us have experienced this phenomena and it truly rules our lives. The consequences of my focus do determine what decisions I will make at any given moment, thus determining a destination of success or failure.
Remember, asking means imagining.
What is success? Success is a state of mind. Success is a continual realization that I’m doing my best; I won’t win them all; I enjoy the ones I do win.
I strive to prepare, progress, and reach higher levels of enlightenment, talent, effectiveness, sharing, and discipline. That is success for me.
Now, for you the definition or meaning may differ and then you will experience a different set of circumstances and world view for your life. This is what makes life so rich.
The creator gave me one gift above all others and that is the ability to choose.
I can choose my meaning and it will dictate what decisions I can or will make. I also believe that I have five basic needs beyond survival, safety, and physical needs. These could be categorized as psychological or spiritual needs.
These five needs can be ranked in any order like a combination to a safe which drive my behavior in various directions.
They are, certainty, variety, love/connection, significance, and growth. These facets are like the compass dial pointing me to true north.
Personally, these five needs have shifted place the more I have recovered from alcoholism and might shift again in the future.
Today, love/ connection leads my list because I believe God is love and when I can connect with others, I feel a deeper connection with my inner source.
Growth is next because if I no longer am teachable, I am regressing. I am either growing or dying.
Variety is the juice or spice of life that excites me to get up in the morning to discover new possibilities and new relationships. This provides me with a degree of significance because I have been able to witness and share in the awakening of people who wanted so badly to change their lives and recover from alcohol.
I now am certain that if I meet the above needs, the certainty is a by product of the other four. It is fascinating for me to discover this insight because most are not aware of it.
In the past, certainty was number one. I lived in such a state of fear, guilt, shame, and regret that I needed some sort of certainty to help me escape these emotions.
Alcohol was the certain drug of choice, which provided a meaning of avoidance of these feelings, that also caused me to continue to make decisions that were not in the best interest of my health and family.
I can now see the cycle or process of how powerful focus or questions can affect my choices and decisions. What I imagine is the result of the asking and answering of questions.
What, Who, Where, When, How, and Why is the dial of questions I use. Again, the order or sequence has shifted for me as well. “What if,” is really a childish mode of questioning because it is based in hypothetical assumptions. This is useful to do when problem solving.
I have experienced that why questions can quickly determine a meaning or belief so I am always cautious as to what excuses or false promises derive from this question. Why questions are your endless loop scenarios.
Where is your Focus now? Where is your mind wandering? I highly encourage you to watch this video on the major benefits of reclaiming your focus.
Your attitude is determined by the focus of your mind. If you decide to live in a state of gratitude, notice what your mind releases in the form of ideas of pleasure. Notice, when you feel fits of anger or disappointment and what ideas are manifested.
As you you can imagine, much skill or discipline is required. Awareness is key. Watching our thoughts and directing them by the questions we ask is the start of the process of healing, discovery, and personal growth.
Small steps lead to big changes. My desire is that we can stop for several moments in the day of distractions and concentrate to the best of our ability what questions we are asking of ourselves. Imagine all of the pre programming we have accumulated over the course of our lives.
Live in the present and watch your internal dialogue. Like the seed that is planted in the soil, it will grow.